Post 500-level Mark Musings...

Dear God, kidlets. This rag is thundering through the blogosphere like a Viking Cheerleader drunk on a kegger of Hefeweizen! Who woulda thunk that merely two weekends ago, it was still just a fledgling, a sub-300 clickthrough wannabe. The kind of whiny blog you'd get stuck with on your way to the movies, and who you were specifically told couldn't watch anything other than Bambi on the big screen.

Oh, but now, campers, now When You Were Five is a black taloned shadow that screams out of the leaden skies to carry off the shivering chihuahua that is the Internet. Poor, poor Internet chihuahua. Someone should start a telethon.....

"Yes, yes, is the caller there?"
"Yes, I'm here, and I think it's horrible what When You Were Five is doing to the Internet. Just horrible! I can't take my browser outside now for fear it'll be carried off over the hills!"

"What this country needs is someone to stand up to this blog! Our children are being exposed to it right under our noses! I blame the liberal media and it's pandering ways!"

"I dunno, like at first I was kinda scared, but When You Were Five was really cute, y'know? A lot of my friends said I shouldn't go steady, but...but....I love him!"

If YOU have an opinion on the continuing effect that When You Were 5 is having on YOUR community, let us know! Millions of people all across America are learning how to stand up and fight for their right to a decent, God-fearing Internet experience. And with your help, When You Were Five will be taught to toe the line! Learn right from wrong! A morally-upright fresh, country Brie from the squirt tube of Velveeta porn!